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May 24, 2004

Hey--Reality DOES Bite!

It really sucks to be poor. I mean, it really sucks. Now, I know I’m not living under a bridge strumming a 3-stringed guitar for pocket change. I’m speaking more about your run-of-the-mill poor—employed (often in retail), able to pay for life’s necessities, and usually able to pay all the bills (although some juggling may be required).

I hate that I can’t just go out and buy what I want. I’m not looking to purchase a yacht, I just want to be able to live without money-related panic attacks a few times each week. Currently we pay the following bills each month:

1. Cable Internet Access

2. Digital Cable

3. Phone

4. Electricity

5. Propane

6. Ensie’s student loan payment (good planning on my part—7 years of schoolin’ and debt and no degree yet!)

7. Car payment (from Hell)

8. Chiropractor

9. Car Insurance

10. Rent

11. Frinklin’s Cell Phone

12. Credit Card 1

13. Credit Card 2

14. Credit Card 3

That’s a fuck of a lot of bills. That doesn’t even include things like (the ever-rising cost of Southern California) gas, car maintenance, pet food, groceries, etc, etc, etc…the list goes on and on.

I decided some time ago that I just need to win the lottery. That’s all there is to it. Just one time. I’m not greedy. I don’t even need to win PowerBall. Just the state lottery would do it for me.

I know the odds of winning aren’t good, especially since I have to weigh the two arguments constantly going on in my head as I fill out the QuickPik bubble on the CA Lottery form. One side of my brain truly believes that I will win the lottery. I begin to dream about the things I will purchase, about quitting my job to stay home with my future children all day, of the friends I will gift with financial security. Just as I’m getting comfortable living in my dreams, a loud voice interrupts, The Lottery is just a tax on the Stupid! Don’t you KNOW the ODDS of WINNING the lottery?! Why did you waste a dollar for something that will never happen?”

Damn reality.

Posted by Ensie at May 24, 2004 07:08 PM


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