Back to The Wedding - Bridesmaid's Dress Shopping

I once promised to write more about my sister Katie's wedding, and then promptly forgot all about it. I've decided to sprinkle a few stories in here and there to fulfill my promise. First, the real-life story about shopping for my bridesmaid dress, which, as you can imagine, was super-fun! not being a size six or eight like the rest of the women in my family.

My mom actually fluctuates between being a size 6 and a size 10 (please don't hate me for talking about this Mom). She's petite, and gaining or losing a few pounds makes a huge difference in her size, which sucks for her because it creates a major swing in her wardrobe. MOM - TOTALLY NORMAL. She's struggled with her weight her entire life, but is now a Weight Watchers lifetime member and I'm so proud of her. She works so hard at it and I love her so much for what she's accomplished because it makes her happy. But I love her no matter what she weighs or what she looks like.

My sister Katie has a hard time keeping weight on. Yes, you heard that right. Keeping weight ON. She works outdoors as a therapeutic horseback riding instructor for disabled kids and can walk up to fifteen miles a day in the So. Cal sun, so she's constantly working out, all day long. She tends to be a size 4 or 6, and was cautioned against losing weight before the wedding for fear her gorgeous dress would not fit. If I haven't mentioned it before, she also has almost nonexistent leg hair, is perpetually tan, small pores, and her hair is perfectly, naturally highlighted by the sun. She wears almost no makeup and looks great. I swear to God I'm not just saying this because I'm her sister. If she didn't want to remain anonymous I would post her picture and you would see it's true.

Sister Nikki is 15 years old and is a perfect six. She's freckled and naturally cute.

Then there's me. I'm into the double digits of clothing sizes, well into the upper teens to be honest. I've gained weight since moving to Washington and I haven't been as active as I once was, even though this place seems to spawn hikers and campers by the carload. I have a hard time doing anything in the rain and my job has changed from moving heavy boxes for at least an hour a day to being almost completely desk bound. I know I need to get active but starting is the hardest part.

Anyway - enough intro, lets get to the main event!

I made several trips down to San Diego, only to drive North again to Costa Mesa to a well known bridal shop. These were fun trips with all of us sharing a fitting room, watching my sister try on various wedding gowns until she found the perfect one, seeing my Mom find the perfect mother-of-the-bride-dress, and so on.

Predictably, the sample dresses were not available in sizes over 12, so I had to make due with slinging the hangers over my head and holding them against my body to see if I thought they would look good. Fortunately, I have a good sense of what does look good one my body, so I picked out a dress with a V-neck, empire waisted, floor length, with wide shoulder straps, and a relatively high back. My Mom and sisters picked out a few other dresses for me to try, but in the end the dress I knew would work was the one that was chosen.

Nikki, Mom, and I all needed out measurements taken to get our dresses ordered that day, and a sales assistant was called to help. She took Nikki's measurements, then carefully measured my Mom, then turned to me and asked, "Would you like everyone to step out of the room while I take yours?"

"What?" I asked, incredulously,"They're my family. I'm pretty sure they know I'm fat. Hey guys," I said, turning around, "You do know I'm fat, right?"

Katie laughed, Nikki blushed, and my Mom looked me disapprovingly (not because I'm fat, but because I was making fun of the sales assistant). The sales assistant had the decency to look chagrined. She took my measurements and shut the hell up.

I wish that I had taken it further - that I had asked her why she had offered to have everyone leave when I had to strip down to my underthings but not when they did. Or if she did that for everyone who is overweight. Or if she singles out all overweight people and treats them differently.

Getting that dress was so unbelievable stressful. If it had been up to me, I would have worn pants to the wedding. I had never owned a formal dress until until Katie's wedding. I did not attend a single formal dance in high school (I was too busy with horse shows), and wore jeans to my own elopement and backyard reception. I still haven't seen the official wedding photos, so I really have no idea what I really looked like at the event. But it still makes my eyes sting to remember how painful the process of buying the dress was.

Gamp's Law of Elemental Transfiguration (spoilers)

Today while riding in the car, Frinklin and I began discussing Gamp's Law of Elemental Transfiguration which comes up in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. He had mentioned earlier that an article had been written pointing out the terrible economics of the series. Rowling addressing this with a bit with an all encompassing set of laws that apparently covers food (Hermione reminds Ron that one cannot create food out of thin air, only multiply what one already has, according to Gamp's Law of Elemental Transfiguration). It is also mentioned earlier that wizards and witches cannot force others to fall in love with others without the use of potions which wear off over time.

Since there is also the use of Gringotts to store riches and wizarding world money, and because one never sees anyone able to do it, it's safe to assume that no one can create money. Thus, the third law under Gamp's appears set.

So the first three laws of Gamp's (assumed) are:

1. One cannot create food, only multiply it once you are in possession.
2. Once cannot force another to fall in love.
3. One cannot create or multiply money through the use of magic.

Now, what would the last two laws be? I have one thought - You cannot change your shape or assume the guise of another person without the use of Polyjuice potion, unless you are a metamorphmagus or animagus.

Let me know what your thoughts are in the comments.

Your Score: GRYFFINDOR!

You scored 24% Slytherin, 12% Ravenclaw, 52% Gryffindor, and 36% Hufflepuff!

You might belong in Gryffindor,
Where dwell the brave at heart,
Their daring, nerve, and chivalry
Set Gryffindors apart.

Gryffindors are known for their courage, audacity, and devotion to what is good and honest.

Found at So anyway...

Harry Potter VII

I'm about a week late covering Harry Potter, as I finished the book in one day. Frinklin beat me by speed-reading through it in 5 hours. My Mom was amazed at this, "How can you finish a 750 page book in one day?"

"I have no children." I responded. Although Eden has two little ones and managed the feat as well. My Mom is a big reader and despite having two kids exactly in the HP age range (now 15 and 16) and me pushing them to read the series, it never caught on in their house. I think they'll enjoy them later in life.

Anyway...spoilers below

I really enjoyed HP7. I thought the tone was perfect. You really felt exactly what Harry was feeling throughout the story; from the excitement and fear of leaving his childhood home and sadness at Mad Eye's death to the boringness and frustration during the endless search for the Horcruxes in the middle of the book. That portion of the book left me wanting anything to happen, anywhere, just as I imagine the characters were feeling.

I thought almost nothing could top that last 100 pages of book six for excitement where Dumbledore was killed and the Death Eaters where fighting and Harry was chasing down Snape...boy, was I wrong. The way Rowling wove the exciting moments in and out of the story - the visit to to Godric's Hollow and battle at Bathilda's home, the visit to Luna's father, the capture by Deatheaters and escape from the Malfoy's mansion, and the robbery of Gringots were all very well done.

The climactic battle of Hogwarts was exactly that - climactic in the ultimate. By the time it comes you are ready for it like no other. Ten years of reading, seven books, over 4,000 pages - it's time for it to come down. And Harry stands up to it mightily. What better way to show what a selfless, loving character Harry is than to have him sacrifice himself for his friends who have become his family. Harry sacrifices himself, and in doing so, saves himself.

The loss of Colin Creavy, Lupin, Tonks, Fred, Scrimgour, and Dobby (which hit me weirdly hard) felt true to the story. I don't think Harry needed to die, nor do I think Ron or Hermione's deaths would have added to the plot line.

I understand that a lot of people are annoyed at the cheery epilogue. I love a cheezy, sappy epilogue where everything turns out well at the end, so it suited me just fine.

KOMO TV Blogger Meetup

So...I got a little got a little invite in my inbox today...

KOMO-TV and its owner, Fisher Communications, has graciously agreed to serve as host for a blogger meet-up at 6:30 p.m. on Thursday August 2nd. The event will be at Fisher Plaza, 140 Fourth Avenue North in downtown Seattle. Light hors d'oeuvres and refreshments (alcoholic and otherwise) will be served and everyone who attends is promised a cool piece (or pieces) of KOMO swag. That's right; we're digging deep for this.

This is a social event, so come prepared to meet and make new friends. If you know of a local blogger who's not on the list here, please let me know or feel free to invite them, too. We'd like to meet everybody.

If you don't already know me, I'm Chris Pirillo - coffee addict, Seattlite, and a regular ol' blogger who also has a YouTube channel. If you have any questions about this event, feel free to contact Leanne Dillon from KOMO-TV at (206) 404-6055.

KOMO-TV is interested in getting to know bloggers in the area, and what better way to do that than with a little party? Again, this is a social event; there's no agenda for the station other than helping facilitate this meet-up. Fisher Communications recognizes the significance of the personal media revolution, and they want to listen and pay attention to what you're saying. I think this is a good way to start.

KOMO-TV news anchors will be there, so don't forget to bring your camera! You'll also be able to take pictures of yourself (and your co-anchors) at the anchor desk.

Please use the RSVP function of this Evite to let us know if you're coming. We want to make sure we have enough food for everybody.

We should all use "komomeetup" as the tag for photos, videos, blog posts, etc.

Anyone planning on attending?

Harry Potter Tragedy (No Spoilers)

I've been so careful!

When I heard that the last Harry Potter book had been leaked online I didn't visit anyplace that I thought might be suspect. No Wikipedia or Google for me. And I wasn't going anywhere near the reviews at the New York Times or the Baltimore Sun.

But this morning! This morning! Damn you Publishers Weekly! There was a YouTube video up on a book blog this morning showing a person spoiling the end of HP Book SIX for people waiting in line at a Barnes and Noble at the book release party in 2005. A guy was driving by in a car while screaming out the window "Snape kills Dumbledore!" at the top of his lungs. I realize now that I was damning myself the moment I laughed at this video but I thought, what the hell.

I figured I'd send this to my old boss, she'd think this was funny. I copied the link into my email (which I will not be linking to here, although you can find it under "Snape Kills Dumbledore").

Now pay attention because here is the key moment.

I clicked on the link in my email to confirm that the link worked and immediately up popped the YouTube window. However, before the video showed the comments became clear. And in the comments was THE LIST OF ALL THE CHARACTERS WHO DIE IN THE SEVENTH BOOK!!!

I KNOW!!

Fortunately I only saw two names, and in a discussion yesterday with Frinklin ("name three characters you think are going to die") I had already guessed one of them.

I know this is silly and not a big deal in the grand scheme, but I'd like not to know the ending going into this. I'm not a big mystery reader, in fact, I hate mysteries normally. But I do enjoy the Harry Potter books, and would like to have it be a surprise the first time around.

That will teach me not to laugh at other people's misfortune.

Michael Vick is a Total Asshole

Finally.

I hope he goes to jail for a long time.

I read over 3300 pages this weekend. What did you do?

I'm so ready for Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. I spent the last several days reading the entire series through volume six. I forgot how enjoyable they are, and how crazy suspenseful the the last 100 pages of Half-Blood Prince are. I couldn't sleep for a good two hours after finishing because I was so amped from those last chapters.

Frinklin and I also saw Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix last week and I was disappointed. Book five has been my favorite for some time (although up on re-reading, six now tops the list) and to see the story so choppy and without a single subplot included made me feel like the director put no heart into the story at all. Where was the drama about Ron joining the Quiddich team? Or Draco Malfoy? Or Hermione and Ron becoming Prefects? I understand that the director, David Yates, wanted to chop out all references to Kreatcher as well until JK Rowling told him it would be detrimental to the story if he did. Yates feels that all the films have been too long and worked hard to keep the movie shorter, which you can really feel. Hasn't he learned that people will sit through long films if they're good?

And dude - get a better special effects team together. Grawp looked like crap and the thestrals certainly could have been better.

On the upside, the acting is getting better and better. Daniel Radcliffe is the spitting image of the Harry Potter in my mind. I can only hope that the excellent peripheral actors will also sign on the the last two films.

I am totally addicted to the Discovery Channel

It's true. I realized it on the Fourth of July when I chose to stay in and watch a marathon of MythBusters instead of enjoying the beautiful day. I'm oddly fascinated by the weird stuff they come up with - like getting sprayed with a skunk to see what cleans it off best (Episode 16). Or constructing a crossbow out of newspaper (Episode 44). Or even weirder (Episode 78 - Can you Walk on Water?).

There's also Deadliest Catch, which I accidentally watched while in San Diego for my sister's wedding, and then immediately went on a watching spree when I came home. Holy crap is crab fishing insane! I even got Frinklin into DC, which is narrated by...

Mike Rowe. Dirty Jobs is on almost as much as MythBusters, and I'm all the happier for it. I will often TiVo it so that I can indulge myself in the evening when I have time to watch several episodes at once.

There's no two ways to put this - Mike Rowe is hot. Aside from the fact that he's a damn handsome man, the ability to remain funny and charming while standing in or shoveling large amounts of poo is a rare quality. And he's a Renaissance man - used to be an opera singer, is currently writing a novel, and plans to return to the stage once Dirty Jobs ends (we'll just forget about the QVC stuff, OK? Although he still had a funny/charming/self deprecating thing going on even then).

When discussing Mike, I always refer to him as, "my other boyfriend."* (My original boyfriend being Zach Braff, although I've heard he's a douche bag, so I'm considering dumping him and going with Mike full-time).**

*I realize referring to someone as "my boyfriend" when I'm already married makes me sound like my grandmother, who used to refer to various celebrities as "my boyfriend" even though they were 40 (or more!) years younger.

**Hi Honey! I love you!

Ravage, get off the couch!

Because you were wondering what happened to Soundwave.

Can't Sleep, Clowns Will Eat Me

As part of my new position at Bob's Hogs, I'm required to go through the files at all the local stores. It's taken a me a couple of weeks to do this, as some stores have boxes, instead of drawers full of old information. And so much of it weird or bad info. that had no reason to be saved, but I digress.

In going through the business card collection for one store, I came across something frightening. I hate when clowns just creep up on you that way!

I've blacked out the contact info. to protect the creepy, but still!

Even better, the back of the card has the price list ("Klown with magik, hard triks, free toys and free kandy" - enough with the Ks already!) and at the bottom there is a special note, "And I clean ovens, refridgerators, floors and windows. Money back guaranteed, becuase I am a master cleaner. Money back guaranteed." Guaranteed!

"But cotton candy and scotch, that's a weird funk. It's like - oh man - did someone just fuck a clown in here?!" - Dave Attell (Skanks for the Memories)

More Than Meets the Eye

I'm probably the 500th person to use that title, but WTF - it fits.

Frinklin and I went to the first showing of Transformers today in Tacoma and GOOD HOLY GOD did the movie ROCK!

If you, like me, were a fan of the television show growing up - go!

If you like to see kick ass special effects - go!

If you like to see lots of shit get blown up in a big, big way - go immediately!

I'm not usually a Michael Bay fan, but this movie met every expectation I had in a big way. The nostalgia factor is huge with this movie, and judging from the reaction of the crowd, everyone was happy. There was a lot of clapping and shouting, especially when Optimus Prime made his first appearance. On more than one occasion several people stood up to clap. Shia LaBeouf was great - after seeing him in this action role, I'm definitely looking forward to the fourth Indiana Jones film.