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June 29, 2004

More People Who NEED to Be Slapped

Television advertisers NEED to be slapped. Most definitely.

A few examples that are currently irking me:

· The most recent Midol commercial is really getting to me. Picture girls on the beach, in bathing suits. Girl A is wearing a bikini and Girl B, looking shocked, asks, “You’re wearing a bikini during your period?!?” Girl A mentions that she is, and that she took Midol to get rid of bloating, cramps, and TIREDNESS (“irritability” also may be mentioned, usually I’m too busy yelling to Frinklin about the commercial to really pay attention at this point). Now, I’ve only ever taken Midol once, and it didn’t do shit for my nausea-inducing cramps. And it really didn’t have any effect on my energy level. Most pain killers don’t. Whatever—my point is, tiredness is not generally a factor when considering swimsuit styles. If it was, thousands of spring breakers would be covered in burkas each year.

· Why does the word “girthy” need to be used to describe hot dogs? And does this word need constantly repeated by a man eating a hot dog? Let’s be honest—he’s giving head to the hot dog, and I don’t want to see it. Or hear it. Or even hear the word “girthy” again. Ever. And I’m not the only one who sees this as a problem

· KFC needs to stop advertising completely. Right now. Do they really think we’re stupid enough to believe that KFC really stands for “Kitchen Fresh Chicken?” We all know it’s FRIED. We all know it’s bad for you. If you really want to get into what “KFC” stands for, why not this ? And if that weren’t bad enough…now they’re offering the NASCAR Dale Earnhardt Jr. Collectible Chicken Bucket! Ew. Then again, it’s easier to focus my hate when NASCAR and KFC are blended together into one awful focal point.

There are soooo many others. These are just the ones that come to mind immediately.

Posted by Ensie at June 29, 2004 07:28 PM


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