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February 27, 2007

Thanks for the...uh...job?

Once upon a time I was chosen for a Pilot Program for Bob's Hogs and Weiner Pigs. This job covered the entire PNW and involved a lot of travel and coordinating with other Pilot People in other parts of the country. The Boss-Lady told the Pilot People that because we worked in the stores that we understood the processes and that our input was important to the changes being made to the program we were involved in. Bob's Hogs even flew us all to The Land of Ice and Snow to work on a GIANT PROPOSAL that went before the CEO, outlining the wonderful changes that would bring wealth and prosperity to us all.

Cut to now. This week the changes were announced. I got all of one day's notice as to what my new role would be under the new structure (my last day of vacation - something to think about on the flight home from San Diego!). For months the announcement had been delayed (bad sign) and the The Boss Lady had stalled. Turns out the final changes to the program look NOTHING like the initial proposal put together by myself and the rest of the Pilot Team.

The best part is, my own role has been cut from having "dotted line" (I love that corporate-speak) responsibility over 20+ people to just 7 stores. No people, no team. I've essentially been told that I'm lucky to have a job, as others not in a Pilot Position will be required to apply. A basic "quit'cher bitchen'" situation.

There is larger, regional position that I will be allowed to apply for, however I was flat out told, and I quote, "If we thought you were ready for that role, we would have slotted you into it."

Ouch. Guess I shouldn't get my hopes up. They want more managerial experience and a degree*. The position wasn't even offered internally, so I'm assuming they are really hoping for folks from outside the company will apply.

In the meantime, I have people calling me from all over the company asking what the new job will entail. I try to help describe it, even though it isn't the job I've been doing for the last year-and-a-half. I had a team of people. I thought I was prepping to be a manager-type.

This SUCKS. I have 10 years with Bob's Hogs. I really don't want to leave, but I may have no other option. Where do I go if I don't have the experience for the regional job? How do I gain that experience if I can't get it in the position I have now? SUCKS.

*My Dad thinks I'm not eligible for the job because I have no degree. He told me, "Oh, they want a degreeeeeed person, as though I was diseased for not having one.

Things the non-degreed may do/say in interview situations due to the lack of degree:

Flinging of feces like all lower primates.

"Are my good overalls appropriate for the second interview?"

"How do you feel about nudism in the workplace?"

"I see you're dog friendly. Is this a reptile friendly workplace too?"

"I see you're dog friendly. Just how many dogs can one bring? 10? 12?"

"Is this a touch-friendly workplace?"

"I have a second business - It's human composting. Hey, would you mind using these biodegradable bags?"

"I have a huge collection of roadkill recipes."

"I'm a massive Nickelback fan." (hehe)

"No, I prefer to sit on the floor. It's more natural for the back. Chairs aren't ergonomically correct you know."

"Sorry, I had to run to get here. My car wouldn't start - the breathalyser again!"

Posted by Ensie at February 27, 2007 07:50 PM

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That SUCKS! I'm so sorry, Ensie! They've got no idea what they're missing.

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